Almost never have children mentioned exotic trips, pools, large houses, or expensive clothes or toys. Instead, feeling good, encouragement, kindness, play and connection with mom or dad are at the top of the list. Take the time to ask your children these two important questions. The answers may surprise you. Here are twenty-four ideas for creating a happy home, submitted by the children of parents from previous classes.

1. Hug More: “When I come home, my mom and dad hug me a lot. That’s when my house feels happiest!” (Nora, age eight)

2. Create Special Moments: “My home is happy when my mom lights candles while we eat dinner.” (Harvey, age ten)

3. Cook Together: “I like it when we cook something yummy together – like cookies or bread – and the house smells delicious!” (Robert, age nine)

4. Celebrate Art: “My house has a big refrigerator with kids’ artwork and magnets all over it, and even some that fall off!” (Tobias, age five)

5. Express Affection: “I like it when Dad throws me up in the air and messes up my hair!” (Rebecca, age four)

6. Relax and Enjoy One Another: “We have lots of puppy piles – all of us lie all over each other on the couch and laugh a lot.” (Katrina, age eight)

7. Share Special Time before Bed: “I like it when my mommy brushes my hair for a long time and sings songs to me before bed.” (Beth, age four)

8. Play Games Together: “A home is happy when everybody has fun playing checkers or Monopoly and eats popcorn, too.” (Jason, age thirteen)

9. Keep Good and Nutritious Food in the House: “My house feels good when there’s lots of really good foot to eat.” (Merrill, age seven)

10. Play Together: “there’s cool toys that moms and dads like to play with, too!” (Alexi, age ten)

11. Enjoy a Pet: “A happy house has creature in it – a bird, gerbil, hamster, turtle, guinea pig, rat, fish, lizard, snake, dog, cat, or monkey. I’ve had all of them in my house, and boy, does it smell! But in my house, it’s okay. (Jerod, age ten)

12. Dance and Play Music Together: “In my house, when it’s happy, there is music playing and we all dance together. My dad teaches us the cha-cha-cha!” (Amber, age eleven)

13. Appreciate One Another: “My mom sits and looks at me and smiles sometimes when my house is happy.” (Kalenda, age four)

14. Listen to One Another: “Everybody listens to each other instead of yelling and screaming.” (Samuel, age fourteen)

15. Remember the Extras: “A nice house has wind chimes hanging, and you can hear birds singing outside the window.” (Tara, age five)

16. Pamper One Another: “Happy houses have big bubble baths for kids that they can stay in until all the bubbles are gone.” (Lauren, age seven)

17. Communicate Openly: “When people like each other in their house, they sit around for a while after dinner and talk about all kinds of stuff.” (Amy, age thirteen)

18. Show Interest in One Another: “In a house that is happy, people ask you how your day was, and they really mean it!” (Lisa, age fifteen)

19. Share and Read Stories Together: “Happy people read books together and tell stories by the fire about neat things.” (Morley, age twelve)

20. Wrestle Together: “Families that get along like to wrestle and giggle together!” (Bo, age eleven)

21. Keep Plants or Flowers in the House: “I like it when we have flowers on the table and the whole house smells good.” (Jonah, age six)

22. Have Family and Friends Visit Often: “Our house is fun when everybody has friends over and there’s lots of laughing going on!” (Abe, age sixteen)

23. Acknowledge One Another: “Everyone compliments each other and does special things for each other.” (Shanti, age fourteen)

24. Create a Friendly and Safe Environment: “When I’m gone, I can’t wait to get home because I just like being there!” (Carlos, age twelve)

Consider interviewing your child on what he or she thinks makes a home happy. Ask for at least ten ideas, and then surprise your child with them, one by one.

Diana Loomans is the author of “100 Ways to Build Self-Esteem and Teach Values, an H J Kramer Book, published in a joint venture with New World Library. You can visit her website at www.dianaloomans.com

Well, I’ve been parenting for almost 21 years now and so I feel pretty safe in writing this “so called Quick Start Guide”. It doesn’t teach you how to change diapers, feed your kids, or any of those things that the books tell you. But what it does tell you is what I’ve learned about being a mother through years of trial and error, tears and joy, ups and downs, mistakes, great choices, and everything in between. These are the 10 most valuable lessons you can adopt right now, and cut down on your learning curve, so you can have the greatest impact on your child’s life.

Always Say You’re Sorry

You will make mistakes from day one until the end, and it’s okay. What’s not okay is not apologizing. Your child learns to be humble from you. Even if your child misbehaved, and you handled the situation badly, you should apologize too. Two wrongs don’t make a right. We all have permission to start over, and learn from our mistakes, but if we can’t admit we make mistakes by apologizing, then how do we learn?

Listening and Coaching is Far More Effective than Giving Advice

Get into this habit early because sooner or later your children will tune you out. You are doing your children a disservice to not teach them how to solve their own problems. Very few people like to be told what to do. Children, and especially teens are no different. Isn’t it better to be a sounding board and guide someone to make the right choice for their life? That’s what coaches do.

The Simple Memories will Last a Lifetime

You don’t have to do anything elaborate to create memories for your children. You will be amazed at the simple little memories that will stick with them. My most heartwarming memory of my mother is coming in from playing out in the cold and her putting my feet in one of those old hairdryers to warm them up. She told me she was going to go make me some hot chocolate, and all I remember was happily drifting off to sleep with warm tootsies.

Be the Unique Mom you were Designed to Be

Mothers spend way too much time comparing themselves to other mothers, wishing they were more organized, or could cook better, or play sports better, etc. But what you don’t realize is that your children are attached to the unique mom that you are, and they don’t want any other mother. My son Kai absolutely loves the macaroni and cheese I make for him, and it comes from a box! How crazy is that?!

Let Your Children’s Misbehavior Tell You What’s Going on in Their Inner World

Your children are misbehaving for a reason. It’s not because they are bad kids. Your kids are trying to communicate something to you. Your child could be angry. He could be hungry. He could be tired. She could be needing your attention. She could be having a hard time verbalizing her feelings. Your child may want more independence. There are so many things that could be going on inside your child or teen. Seek to get inside your child’s inner world before you seek to punish.

Walk and Talk Your Family Values and Beliefs

Many moms say they know what their family values are, or what their beliefs are, but do your kids know what they are? Are you truly walking your talk? If you say you value kindness or health, does your life reflect that? If you say all people should be treated equally, do your children see you doing that? Talk is cheap, but modeling is powerful.

Work on Yourself before Your Work on Your Children

Think your children have problems? Slow down. Take a look at yourself first. Could you be parenting differently to correct these problems? These are little human beings we are shaping, and we shape them by shaping our behavior. So before we ground our kids or put our children in therapy, we too need to consider how we can grow as parents ourselves.

Let the Consequences of the World Teach Your Children Lessons

As hard as it can be to let our children fall down and take the hard knocks, the natural consequences of life’s lessons are often the greatest teachers. Let your child get an F instead of making her do her homework. Don’t remind your child to take her lunch; he will probably remember when he is hungry at school. If you protect your children when they are young, they will be in for a rude awakening as adults in the real world.

Don’t Lose Yourself in Motherhood

You were a woman before you became a mom. And that woman had interests and passions. Do you remember what those were? Or have you sacrificed all those for motherhood? I have coached too many mothers who have lost themselves because they gave up who they were when they became moms. Don’t do this. Be an example to your children (especially your daughters) of what it means to take care of yourself and be yourself. Having a kid centered family does them a disservice.

Encourage Your Children to Nurture their Talents and Passions

Just like you have talents and passions, so do your children. There are so many adults in this world today that have no idea what they are good at, or what they are passionate about. Don’t let this happen to your children. Give them the opportunities to tap into what God gave them so they can contribute to this world in a big way and be happy about it.

So whether you are a new mom, or a veteran mom, implementing these ten parenting habits will surely make a profound and positive difference in your child’s life. But you will still have to wait to find out how well this Quick Start Guide works. So enjoy the process!

Do you have hyperactive kids? Sometimes kids are just being kids and people are too quick to label them as hyper or having ADD or ADHD. There’s a lot more to the ADD and ADHD than being hyper. There are many reasons why kids can become hyper. Check out 10 reasons your child is always hyper.

1. Food dyes: There’s been a recent study in the UK where food dyes in drinks and snacks have been linked to a higher likelihood of hyperactivity. Specific dyes mentions were FD&C Blue 1 and 2, FD&C Green 3, Orange B, FD&C Red 3, FD&C Red 40, FD&C Yellow 5 and 6. Avoiding artificial colors in your child’s foods may decrease the occurrences of hyperactivity.
2. Preservatives: Food preservatives were looked at in combination with the artificial colors so studies say it’s hard to determine if preservatives alone cause hyperactivity in children, but recommendations have been made to reduce or try to eliminate preservatives from your child’s diet if they are always hyper.
3. Sugar: While studies cannot confirm a solid link between the consumption of sugar and hyperactivity the average teacher can. If kids are given sugary snacks in the morning to celebrate a birthday they are louder and less focused for the rest of the day. The body turns sugars into carbs which fuel the body and give us energy. Certain kids are more sensitive to the effects of sugar than others.
4. Overstimulation: In babies we know that overstimulation may cause them to cry inconsolably. In older children overstimulation comes out in tantrums, aggressive behavior toward others and hyperactivity. Hyperactive children tend to get into more fights with their peers and have trouble coping with situations on the playground.
5. Excessive television watching: It seems like television watching gets blamed for everything. Teens go on killing rampages because they watched too much violence on TV; we have a generation of overweight kids now because of too much television, etc. Now hyperactivity is also being linked. Watching TV is a sedentary activity and children that are prone to hyperactivity should have an active lifestyle in order to help get rid of their extra energy. Watching TV is not active and therefore should be limited to an hour a day according to experts for those children that are prone to hyperactivity.
6. High thyroid levels: The thyroid controls your metabolism by producing hormones. If you have hyperthyroidism that means your thyroid is producing too many of these hormones and your metabolism is going faster than it should. People with this condition often have trouble with being too thin. I’m sure many of us wish we had this problem, but it can be quite serious in children. One side effect of hyperthyroidism is hyperactivity.
7. Lead poisoning: The effects of lead on the brain have been studied for years. Lead poisoning is the leading environmental hazard threatening children today. Low levels of lead poisoning can cause hyperactivity, low IQ, learning disabilities and aggressive behavior.
8. Caffeine: Caffeine is a stimulant and can have the effect of making a child hyper or the opposite effect of making them sleepy. In kids with ADD caffeine has actually been shown to help calm the kids and make them more focused. However, if your child has not been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD the stimulants will likely result in a more energetic and squirmy child. It is important to note that caffeine does not affect some children at all.
9. Food allergies: Not all children respond to food allergies with hyperactivity, but some have been recorded. Food allergies that have been noted to cause hyperactivity are eggs, milk, wheat, soy and fish. To truly know, your child must be diagnosed by a professional, but hyperactivity may be a symptom of something as easy to solve as diet.
10. Stress: High stress situations for kids can cause them to freak out and want to move around. It’s a common response for kids. It’s kind of the fight or flight response to a stressful situation. They don’t know what to do to ease the stress and they just want to get away from it. They will get up and move around and fidget in their seats. These actions are indicative of a hyper child, but they are really triggered by stress. If you can determine what is stressing that student out and help them through it the hyper behavior should take care of itself without further treatment.

Apparently I’m not the only parent who goes through the challenges of their kids abusing their smart phones. www.shopphoneservice.com shared a great article with us on the top 10 ways teens abuse their smart phones.  It might be helpful to sit down with your teen and go over this list – maybe (just maybe) it might deter them from being so careless. But I think the best idea for gaining responsibility is shared at the end of this article.

Few things in this world can withstand the destructive force of the average teenager, none of them man-made. So it should come as no surprise to you that your teen’s smart phone has been reduced to all the functionality of a doorstop. We can count on one hand all of the things that can take such punishment, but we needed both hands for this list – 10 ways that teens abuse their smart phones:

1. Laundry – Multi-pocketed cargo pants and lightweight, minuscule electronic devices make for an accident-prone mix, take it from us. Many are the smart phones that have gone for an unintended spin, never to be heard from again.
2. Butt-Crunch – If his pocket of choice for phone storage happens to be a hip pocket, your teen is very likely to one day be sitting on a small fortune. And not in a good way. When butts go down, smart phones quite often go belly-up.
3. Wet ‘n Wild – Swimming, water-skiing, pool parties, and even car washes have been the death of more smart phones than we can count. Kids carry them everywhere, so it’s easy to forget when that’s not such a great idea.
4. At The Movies – This may more accurately constitute abuse of the public, or of phone privileges, but it is abuse nonetheless. There are good reasons why many of us wait for films to come to cable or DVD, and this is one of them.
5. Dropping – If you carry it with you everywhere and text constantly, it’s only a matter of time before this happens. Sensitive devices like smart phones don’t generally pass the 3-foot drop test with flying colors.
6. Sharp-Object Stylus – Since smart phones are equipped with touchscreens, there is often a tendency to use something other than one’s finger to select icons on a small display. Typically, that something is whatever pointed object happens to be available, like a pen.
7. Nails – The uniquely feminine version of #6 above, teen girls are often handicapped in their use of a touchscreen. The length of some girls’ fingernails makes this operation decidedly more precarious.
8. Break-ups – Poor little smart phone. Talk about killing the messenger. When a teen romance comes to an end, and the news comes by phone as it so often does, the reaction can be rather detrimental to the device as well as to the recipient of the bad news.
9. Food and Drink Spills – The ubiquity of the smart phone places it in harm’s way at lunchroom tables, dinner tables and laps across the country. This is a case where a Bluetooth can be just the remedy for a sweet tooth.
10. Your Mileage May Vary – Smart phone keypads have very soft and sensitive contacts beneath them, and they can handle only so much use. Eventually some smart guy is going to rate these things a la the EPA, but in texts per hour instead of miles.
11. Texting and Driving  - Their were originally only 10 on the list, so I will add this last one to the list.  This is by far the most dangerous thing that teenagers do with their smart phones.  This habit can not only take their own life, but the life of someone else.

No matter what age your teen is, they all use their smart phones to excess. It may be texting, it may be the internet, or even, gasp, actual conversation, but whatever way they use their smart phone, they don’t take care of it as good as they should. If your teen has gone through too many smart phones this year, you can always threaten to make them pay for the next one. After all, if they have to pay for it, they will be a little more careful with it.

You know by now that sugar-filled foods are not good for your kids. You know it on a cognitive level, but often what we know doesn’t actually impact the choice you make. In fact, the current statistic put out by the American Heart Institute is that adults are eating 22 teaspoons of sugar a day and kids are eating 34!!

It seems hard to even imagine eating 22 teaspoons of sugar in a day. That’s about ¾ of a cup of sugar! You may be thinking I don’t eat that much sugar, and that may well be true, however, you are probably eating a lot more sugar than you think. Sugar is hidden in so many “healthy” foods. Eight ounces of fruit flavored yogurt contains a whopping 6 teaspoons of sugar!! A soda has 8 teaspoons of sugar!!!

But why all the exclamation points? What’s so bad about sugar? It comes from a plant, all the other kids eat it, teachers give it to kids as a reward, sometimes the Dr. even hands out lollipops after a shot! It was good enough for my grandmother? What’s the big deal?

Let’s take a hard look – beyond the generality of sugar being “bad for you” – let’s get into the nitty gritty. What’s happening when we eat sugar?

According to Ann Louise Gittleman, Ph.D

(author of Get the Sugar Out)

Sugar contributes to:

• Weakened Immunity

• Obesity

• Diabetes

• Asthma

• Anxiety

• Lack of Focus

• Allergies

• Hypoglycemia

• Hyperactivity

• Food Cravings

• Fatigue

• Mood Swings

• and that’s only 12 of Gittleman’s 64 listed sugar-related ailments!

You’ll have noticed, in amongst the physical ailments listed above, several mood ailments like hyperactivity, mood swings, lack of focus, anxiety. Sugar directly impacts how your children behave. (It impacts you too! but let’s just focus on the kids for now.) If you are looking for a way to create a more peaceful home – reducing sugar is a big piece of the puzzle.

Nancy Appleton, Ph. D. (author of Suicide by Sugar) writes “Every teaspoon of sugar you eat works to throw the body out of balance and compromise its health.”

It’s clear, sugar is not working for us, it’s making us sick! And, it’s making it harder for us to parent. You know from experience that when your kids are not feeling their best, they don’t act their best.

But here’s the tricky bit: it’s not so simple to sleuth out all the sugar in your diet and just get rid of it. There are so many names for sugar that even if you are reading all your labels, it can be confusing.

Here are some of the many names for sugar:

White Refined Sugar

Brown Sugar

Molasses

Invert Sugar

Evaporated Cane Juice

Powdered Sugar

Raw Sugar

Turbinado Sugar

Sorbitol

Maltodextrine

Cane Juice Crystals

Cane Sugar

Corn Syrup

Florida Crystals

Names ending in “ose” such as dextrose, fructose, glucose, lactose, maltose and sucrose

High Fructose Corn Syrup (alert: the HFCS industry is working to rename this as Corn Sugar)
Here are 3 alternatives to help you move refined sugar out of your home.

1. Sleuth out your kids’ high-sugar items and make a substitution. Soda can easily be replaced with seltzer and a splash of %100 fruit juice. Yes, the fruit juice has a high fructose content, but it still contains vitamins and minerals, whereas the sugar in the soda is not only devoid of nutrition, but it actually strips the body of it’s natural vitamin and mineral stores.

2. Be a label detective and look for all the above types of sugar on your grocery list. There are many foods you may think don’t include sugar, for example Salsa and Tomato Sauce. Neither requires sweetening, yet most of the major producers add sugar anyway.

3. Make your own sweet treats at home with natural sweeteners like coconut sugar and date sugar. Control how much and what kind of sweetener goes into your own baking. For more information about natural sweeteners, check out my free 7 day Healthy Yummy Kids Program.

Now Action:

Here are 5 things you can do right now to make a difference for your family.

1. Don’t be afraid to set limits. Kids of course love sweets and we want our kids to enjoy life, but they also need for you to be clear that donuts are not breakfast.

2. Reduce the amount of salt in your family’s diet and it will bring down the sugar craving too.

3. Increase the amount of veggies. Greens especially help reduce sugar cravings.

4. Get the support you need to upgrade your family’s diet. Educate yourself about healthy eating. Learn how to make healthy alternatives of your family’s favorite meals. Get some new cookbooks, take a class, hire a health coach, inspire a friend to do it with you. Having support is the key to making changes that stick.

5. Don’t be perfect. Don’t do an “extreme makeover” for your family. One naturally delicious step at a time is what will really help your family transition away from refined sugars.

Nina Manolson MA, CHC is a Certified Health Coach, Family Wellness Expert and the Smokin’ Hot Mom Mentor. She teaches conscientious moms how to make healthy delicious food that the whole family will love. She’s the author of “Feed Your Kids Well In A World That Doesn’t.”

Get Nina’s Free 7 Day Course: “How to Get your kids to eat less sugar and more veggies!”

Go here for Free Instant Access–> www.HealthyYummyKids.com

The Good Life with Forbes Riley and Charlie

What does it take to rev up your engine and get into gear, so you can get out of that muddy rut you’re in? We’re talking about making MAJOR IMPROVEMENTS people, and the time is NOW! As challenging as it may seem, you CAN bring radical change to your life and you WILL live to tell the story (longer, happier and healthier, we might add). But how do you do it? Enter Doreen Rainey, Get Radical success coach, who channels powerful forces to launch you into the next phase of your professional and personal life, and Matt Monarch, who shed his old eating habits to go raw and vegan and forge the world’s largest raw foods empire in the process. And Momnificent mom coach Lori Radun joins us to talk about reality TV’s Snooki, who’ll have to part ways with partying to have a healthy baby. Don’t miss the radical enhancements we’ve made to the show’s structure – on this and future episodes of The Good Life.

Listen to the Podcast of the Show Here 

After we downloaded Google Sketch Up, we watched a few beginner tutorials together so he could learn some basics of the program. I told him to practice and design his first house for me. I can barely describe to you the excitement he felt when he completed his first house. He literally jumped into my arms and gave me a big hug. My son Ian was so incredibly proud of what he had accomplished.

Helping your children tap into their passions and their talents is one of the greatest gifts you can give your children. It helps your children connect to the essence of who God designed them to be. There is no greater self esteem booster than to know who you are, and be passionate about what you have to offer the world.

As youngsters, it’s not always that easy to know what their gifts and passions are. Here are five ways to help make that process simpler.

Expose Your Children to a Variety of Different Activities

Do your best not to limit your children to what is comfortable and familiar to you. If you grew up playing sports, it’s natural to get your children involved in sports, but that may not be their interest or gift. Try other activities as well. Search your local community for activities that may be available to try. Open your mind and your child’s mind to lots of possibilities.

Jackie Evancho’s parents had no idea she was a talented opera singer until they took her to see The Phantom of the Opera. Jackie’s passion to sing, mixed with her amazing talent, grew from one choice to go see a movie in the theater.

Stay Tuned into Your Child’s World

Listen to whatever your children might be telling you regarding their interests. Children will talk incessantly about what interests them. Even if it doesn’t interest you, listen anyway. I bet I know more about exotic cars than most moms out there.

And listen to what your children are saying about what they don’t like. If they don’t like sports or music, they have given you valuable information about themselves. Listen to the subtle clues you receive as well. A child that loathes practicing music is probably not very interested in playing an instrument.

My son Kai hated practicing his saxophone, and eventually he stopped playing. But he loves music. Today he expresses his music through DJing. He has a mixing board, and he will spend hours mixing songs and playing music. You don’t have to ask him to practice that. He does it because he loves it.

Encourage Your Child’s Gifts and Passions

I have heard so many stories of parents throwing a wet blanket over their child’s dreams because they didn’t see the dream as a viable option in life. Don’t be the one to squelch your child’s dreams and passions.

Even if their passions seem so unrealistic, let them dream and follow their heart. You don’t know where God will lead them. My older son Kai wanted to be a professional baseball player for years. He was talented, but not talented enough. We continued to encourage him, but eventually he realized on his own that his dream would not happen.

Today, he is still passionate about sports and wants to be an orthopedic surgeon. We have yet to see where God is going to lead him.

Don’t Be Afraid to Let Something Go

Your child may try different activities for awhile, and then decide he or she doesn’t like them. Even if your child excels at an activity, it is okay to let that activity go. Unless you notice a chronic habit of starting and stopping, it is totally okay to try things out and find out it’s not your cup of tea.

Tell your child he needs to finish out the activity or the semester, and then he can quit. This shows your children that they need to keep a commitment that they make, and not waste money. Finish up the activity, with no questions or pressure, and move on.

Let your Child Take the Lead

It’s always a good idea to let your child take the lead when it comes to choosing her passions and talents. Your role is to be her coach or guide. You can make suggestions based on what you are seeing and hearing from your child. You can encourage your child’s talents and passions. You can expose your child to different activities, but it’s up to your child to know whether he wants to participate on a long term basis or not.

Each of your children is a unique individual, designed perfectly by God. They have their own set of talents and passions that will grow, and eventually be a gift given to this world in some fashion. Unless your child finds what makes her uniquely her, she will not be happy and living a life of fulfillment and purpose.

As parents, it is a gift to help our children find their talents and passions.

To be clear when I refer to strong discipline I do not mean any type of corporal punishment. Kids when I was growing up could be disciplined by any adult that saw them doing something wrong. If you were bad at school you were sent to the principal to get a spanking. And they usually used a paddle to do the spanking. If your neighbor saw you and your brother fighting outside they could come and grab you both by the ear and give you a stern talking to. Times have changed and it has gone in the opposite direction. Now parents are afraid to punish their child for fear someone will turn them in for abuse. A teacher wouldn’t dare lay a finger on your child for fear you’d sue them. Kids are getting away with everything these days and we’re not doing them any favors by letting them run roughshod over us. Check out 10 reasons strong discipline is important for kids.

1. Kids need limits: It’s part of growing up to push the limits. If there are no limits to push then the kid just goes crazy. While the child may not realize that they need limits they do. They need to know what time they are supposed to be home. When they are supposed to go to bed. How much they should be snacking. Without limits kids are just adrift.
2. Disciplined kids grow up to do better in school: There will be certain expectations put on your child when they go to school. If your child has had little to no discipline at home then it will come as quite a shock to them when they are expected to sit in a room and learn all day. Kids that already know discipline will be better able to adapt and they will do better in school.
3. It lets them know you care: If you are too busy doing your own thing to discipline your child what makes you think they will have any respect for you? Will they feel like you don’t care about them because you can’t be bothered to show up and act like a parent. If disciplining is done in a positive loving manner kids will know that you care about them when you discipline.
4. Allows kids to know they have control over their actions: When there are limits set and consequences for their actions then kids will have the tools to make decisions that affect their lives. They will have control over whether they get in trouble or not. When you discipline it’s important to be consistent so kids can count on what will happen if they do something wrong.
5. Teaches cause and effect: When kids know that there will be consequences for their actions this teaches them that they decide what happens. If they don’t do their homework then they will lose privileges to play with their friends or to play on the computer. They choose their behavior and therefore they choose their punishment.
6. Responsibility: Kids will be more responsible if there are clear expectations. When you let your child know how you expect them to behave then that is passing along wisdom from you. Knowing how to follow the rules will make them more responsible adults.
7. Accountability: When your child is held accountable for their actions then that makes them be more accountable in life. If you aren’t giving 100% on the soccer field and you find yourself on the bench you will learn that you need to be accountable to yourself and to your team. If not, then you will find yourself sitting out of the fun.
8. Sets boundaries: All discipline sets boundaries of what kids should and should not do. Should you hit your sister in the head with a bat because she said something that made you mad? No, and if you do you will be punished. If something was said then it needs to be discussed in a cool and rational manner. No violence needs to ensue. You do not go into the street because you could get run over. Boundaries can be physical, monetary or emotional. If you set boundaries for them they will be able to set them for themselves in the future.
9. Mutual respect: If you are clear in what you expect from your child and you are clear about what the penalty will be for not obeying then you are showing respect for your child. That child will also respect you in the long run.
10. Strong moral compass: Your child will develop a strong moral compass as long as you share your morals with them. Let them know what is right and wrong. How you expect them to act and behave. When they know that and then do it they will develop character and strong morals.

We all know just how cute our kids can be.  And our kids know just when to throw us those sad, puppy dog eyes, or that cute little pout.  It’s when we’re tired, or we’ve had an especially good day with them.  But NannyClassifieds has some great tips for us on how to stand firm and be the mom our kids need:

“He has you wrapped around his little finger!” That was the comment so often made to the parent or adult who just couldn’t resist the big sad look of the child who knew how to melt the heart and cause a reversal of any decision deemed not to his liking. Fathers, mothers, grandpas and grandmas, (especially grandpas and grandmas) fall victim to the big pleading eyes of girls and boys of all ages all the time. Here are ten ways you can protect yourself from succumbing to sad puppy dog eyes.

1. Don’t look – Avoid eye contact with the child. Say what you need to say and be firm. If you must look at your child then look sideways and not at those big beautiful, pleading eyes. Or…
2. Make firm, direct eye contact – This takes resolve. Say what you need to say looking directly into the eyes of the child, then purse your lips, raise one eyebrow and resist all attempts your child makes to have you change your mind.
3. Just say no – Or yes, or whatever it is you need to say and walk away. Should your child follow you just say, “That’s it. End of discussion” and don’t stop walking.
4. Let them choose – Maybe your child just wants a choice if you are telling them to do something and they’re pleading with you to do something else. Give them a choice. They can either do what you are asking them to do or they can do some unpleasant task that needs to be done. Most times kids will choose the original request.
5. Act dumb – Your child came to you with a request and your reply was not the desired answer. Puppy dog eyes begin pleading with you, but you look like you don’t understand what’s happening; you’re standing there with a quizzical look on your face, head cocked to one side then the other. It doesn’t take him long to figure out that you are not going to change your mind.
6. Bargain – But this isn’t just any bargain. When your older child comes at you with the puppy dog eyes ready to spin you around that little finger, think of some job you really want done around the house. Give in, but only in exchange for something you want, like a clean garage or the windows washed. And if they don’t like the deal, give them the puppy dog eyes.
7. Reflect the image – Go get a mirror and hold it up to the child’s face. If nothing else, it redirects their thought pattern!
8. Sympathize – “Aw sweetie, Mommy would really like to let you go to the park, but….no means no. Sorry. Maybe we can go tomorrow.” Let your child know that what they want to do just isn’t going to work in the present moment, but later on is a possibility. No doesn’t necessarily mean never.
9. Ignore the child – Sometimes if you ignore them they will go away. Sometimes. Just make sure they don’t go too far away and get into trouble!
10. Give in – Face it, sometimes that look is so precious and the request so minor that you just have to give in. It won’t be the end of the world. But if you do cave, let your little one know that this is an exception and not the rule. And next time choose one of the above responses and stand firm!

1. Exercise as a family

Take bike rides together, go on evening walks, or take weekend trips to the pool. Your children probably aren’t interested in running on a treadmill or hitting up the gym, but when the whole family is involved and it doesn’t feel like a chore, exercise can end up being a lot of fun! They’re also more likely to participate if the whole family is participating, and it’s a good time for everyone to bond.

2. Keep healthy snacks on hand

Your kids can’t eat unhealthy snacks if they aren’t available and no one is forcing you to buy chips and cookies. Instead when they want a snack give them string cheese or an apple and keep a bowl of grapes in the fridge and whole grain snacks in the pantry. The earlier they associate snacks with healthy food items the more likely they’ll be to continue to pick these.

3. Make fruits and veggies fun

An apple or baby carrots are great, but they’re even better when paired with peanut butter, and who can really turn down ants on a log? If the kids are craving a dessert then why not try freezing different fruits like grapes, pineapple, or watermelon? Eating healthy doesn’t have to be gross or boring.

4. Transform video games

Video games don’t have to be a bad thing (though time in front of the television should definitely be limited!!). Try playing any of the new line of “active” video games from Wii or PlayStation – everyone can join in on the fun and you’ll break a sweat jumping around the living room together.

5. Try out different sports

Expose your kids to a variety of different sports to find out which ones click with your kids. If they hate soccer, try swimming, and if basketball isn’t cutting it, then maybe gymnastics will. There are so many different sports to try that there really is something for everything. Getting involved in a team atmosphere will help them learn that being active with friends is fun, and it will teach them the value of teamwork early on in life.

Staying fit is a lifelong challenge, and the earlier kids learn to embrace it the more likely they are to carry the same values with them throughout their lives. Making being fit and healthy fun is the key to success!

Sara is an active nanny as well as an active freelance writer. She is a frequent contributor of nanny agency.  Learn more about her here.